I will die a thousand suns

5-27-15 a poem

I will reborn for a sight of you.

An embrace well worth a thousand deaths.

I will endure the pain of letting go just so that I can hold onto your touch once more.

I will die once again. I am gone, I am dust.

My heart stopped beating and now I can hear yours. 

Take me away, where all our souls can reunite in peace, in bliss, in love.

I shall meet you on another plane. 

Where harmony is our friend, and a look into your eyes tells me it’s all okay.

Eternity is that place that transcends all time and space. 

Our love lives forever in that plane. Where neither life or death will take you away. 

We sure will part ways once again. 

And my heart will beat faster to remind me that I am alive, and left behind, with a pain that might never dissipate with cries. 

Until I can hear your heart beat against mine and mend the cracks that pull me down. 

I shall see you again, on that plane where love is eternal and transcends all time and space.

Up to heaven and down to earth. In that space in between where minds don’t exist. 

Where we all can finally simply coexist. 

Lila- May 27th, 2015 Perú

New moon blah

August 25, 2014

We think we need to have a plan and carry on our illusions and rush to the end line as if we had the power to control the journey. when in reality all is mapped out for us. The divine plan is constantly in action. The currents will eventually take us there or maybe we are already there. In perfection. No need for ‘shoulds’ and ‘dos’. Who do we think we are that we have a say in this game? We are servants of this universe. Spirits’ slaves that need to surrender to the divinity of the flow of life. And if we don’t… well, then the cut gets deeper. The wound hurts and the swelling inflates your mind so much that eventually your ego explodes. Wide open. Exposed. 
Ah the beauty of nothingness. Where you lay your wings and trust that is all taken care of while at the same time working to plant the seeds with a kinda persistence that could only pay off at the end and bring more amazingness into your reality. 

Persistence is the source that waters and nourishes my seeds. 

Fertility. Passion. Unbounded creativity and flourishing unconditional love that compliments my spirits. Meet me in the path. Hold my hand. Hold my heart. Fly with me. Love me. Seduce me. Adore me. Caress the parts of my inner being that are hardened by the callously memories that once burdened me. 

Let’s be. You and me and we. One. Sacred solitude. Perfect alignment. Understanding. 

Lila – Maui, Hawaii 8-25-2014

Shut up and Be

Da Quote:

“The flaw with words is that they always make us feel enlightened, but when we turn around to face the world they always fail us and we end up facing the world as we always have, without enlightenment. 

For this reason, a warrior seeks to act rather than to talk, and to this effect he gets a new description of the world—a new description where talking is not that important, and where new acts have new reflections, and a new world is born.”

“I am not interested in peoples’ various explanations of what is inexplicable. I am not interested in peoples’ opinions masquerading as Ultimate Truth. I am not interested in verbal gymnastics as proof of enlightenment. I am not interested in what people say, but in what they do and how they do it.
I am interested in how we act, in how we demonstrate whatever enlightenment we may have.”

To my ancestors

May 15, 2015

Through my veins runs the grief that once poisoned your blood.

My cells feel the pain that pressured you to feel and hide away.

I am one with the beating of your fears and the pulsating desires that cry for help.

I’m the unheard prayers of your lonely nights.

I’m the tears of your solitude that led you to the depths of your soul.

Where you found yourself and got lost again and again.

I’m here to thank you for the gifts of this pain.

I transmute all emotions into only love and receive this baton with grace and respect for the journey ahead.

For a clean slate where grief will not rule my world and bury me away.

I choose to let go of all your suffering for it cannot longer contaminate my blood .

I’m pure and clean and open to receive all the greatness you left for me to carry on.

I’m here to accept all the love you had and held within your heart.

It is safe for me to love and be fully loved. 

Sometimes you lose 

Sometimes you let go.

You let go of all the love you have for the ones that left before you. 

You transform it and use it to heal yourself. To heal the world. 

From the inside out. 

You accept that you will die too and it will be ok to love so deeply. 

And let vulnerability expose the greatness of your infinite love. 

And it’s ok that sometimes no one will understand this love.

Keep your heart open for only this love will heal all those wounds. Wounds so deep from a past so beyond history.

I am your memory, and yet I recreate the stories, for I am right here right now and I choose to be what I came here to do, unattached from the past.

Clearing my karma to fulfill my dharma. 

Lila –  May 15th, 2015 Lima, Perú


July 7th,2014

I carved my heart out of the depths of my solitude 

And painted it with the tainted memories of the haunting old. 

I reckon that I should ruminate in the ruins of the pain. 

Observe silently the rambling beating of my aching heart. 

Enjoy the ever-present-never-ending moment that makes me feel so much at once.  

Continue taking in the teachings. 

And finally culminate with open eyes

Burned lashes

Teared hearted

Blooming hope.. Less.

Ancient aches

Torn open and exposed..

Pick up and start anew. 

Honoring the choices 

That within me hold the truth 

That leads me towards the way.

Lila – Maui July 7th, 2014 1 am

A mi claun

Febrero 4, 2014
El camino hacia mi claun :

Camino descalzo 

Hacia un abismo profundo

Y mi desnudez me revela algo aún más oculto. 

Quiero saltar y ver más allá
Y las ganas de ser, de sentir y creer

Me anidan el corazón y me quitan la respiración. 

Tu mirada tan fija

Refleja y cobija 

Aquel presente 

Que me conecta conmigo misma.

Y me regresan al hoy 

A sentir como soy

A mostrarme tal cual soy

Sin importar donde estoy. 

Quiero ver más allá

Saber que se esconde detrás 

entregar un poco más 

Saltar sin pensar y

Sentir la profundidad. 

Encuentro la risa y

Me inunda una paz

De aprender a dar

Encajar y carcajear. 

Y jugando descubro

Aquello que andaba oculto

Y riendo me veo 

Y dejo ver aquello que hoy revelo. 
Lila – Perú Feb 2,2014

Beloved sister…

February 24, 2014. 

Oh beloved sister of mine

You are an angel in disguise 

And the devil dressed in white

All rolled into one, yes you are infinite and divine

A sweet reflection of mine

You can bring the feminine from inside out

And show me the masculine hidden within and without.

I have no words to express my gratitude
For you have truly seen me wholly and fried

And accepted me for who I am

And loved me fully 

And held me broken 

With all your heart.

I feel you inside 

Like you are my twin sister 

from some other time, 

My lover from the past,

My best friend, my soul mate from here and now .

You are a paradox in my life

You bring the worst and best to my eyes

Emotions that have no place to be expressed

And Feelings that spur bliss  

Conflicted with the shadows that overcast our fears.

Karma gets worked out 

And I spell out my grief

And I feel dismissed

Rejected by an all pervasive lack and disbelief.

Does empathy have a place?

It might just save the day!

Because I say- we might just need a bit of give and take

So we don’t end up drained at the end of the day. 

I come and go and you take and leave 

I wish words could express 

What your actions so easily manifest

So emotions wouldn’t be at stake

And confusion wouldn’t take the first page.

I wish, I say, but i don’t want you to change a bit

I love you for who you are and accept you just as you see me thru your eyes. 

I just hope we can always work it out 

And love each other unconditionally 

Without reservations or demands.

So Let’s just try to be that person we would like to see,

In you and in me,

And we might just become one indeed. 

In love, in peace, in all. 

I love you so. 
Lila – Maui, Feb 24, 2014

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